Description
The whistle is official. The confidence is personal.
The Fertile Lifeguard Brigade formed when a handful of locals decided the swimming hole needed supervision. They purchased matching whistles before discussing whether anybody could swim. The second meeting covered qualifications.
Now this brigade patrols from the tallest chair available, enforcing sensible rules with a level of confidence usually reserved for county commissioners. Running is prohibited. Splashing is discouraged. Asking the lifeguard to watch your cannonball is considered a formal performance review.
The annual rescue demonstration is their biggest event, although last year the volunteer victim kept standing up to correct the technique. Wear the tee and enjoy honorary membership from safely dry land. It includes no certification, no water-safety guarantee, and absolutely no authority over the kiddie pool.
From the Route 69 business archives. Real town. Invented establishment.
High-quality white T-shirt. Available in XS, S, M, L, XL, 2XL, and 3XL. All sizes $30. Shipping charged separately.
Reviews
There are no reviews yet.